Mamal Beauty tips

Yesterday Paige announced that she is no longer a cat. 
Now she is a dolphin.
This morning she has a white board eraser in her hand when she says: "This is my brush.  My dolphin brush.  It makes my dolphin hair curly."  And then she sits there and "brushes" her hair. 

Thanks for spoiling the fun!

Paige to Beckett: "You chew, chew, chew and then swallow baby.  Chew, swallow.  Chew, swallow."
She stops and looks at me and says: "I just told Beckett the truth about eating."

New Rhyme

Beckett's foot is sticking out of his pajamas.  Paige sits next to him and says this:
"One little piggy when to the market.
One little piggy ate some chips.
One little piggy stayed home.
One little piggy sneezed.
One little piggy ran all the way home.  Weee Weee Weee.!"

Toy Story

Paige is climbing on Mama's back. 
Mama: "Paige, please get off.  Mama is not a toy."
Paige gets off and asks: "Why is Mama not a toy?"
Mama:  "Well, God made Mama a Mama and not a toy."
Paige: "Why?"
Exasperated, Mama says: "I don't know.  Why don't you ask him?"
Paige, as loud as she can: "HEAVENLY FATHER, WHY IS MOM NOT A TOY?????"

Morning Song

Beckett is eating cherieos under the kitchen table and Paige is singing this song: "Try to decorate, Try, Try Try."

Nice one. We have been singing Jesus Once Was A Little Child.  Nice new version by Paige.

I am not Moses

Mama is talking about how she prays at night because it is quiet and she can hear Heavenly Father then.
Mama: "And he helps me remember things and puts good thoughts in my head."
Paige: "That is crazy.  
           (then a really long pause)....
           He doesn't talk to you from the clouds Mama. 
           He talks to you from bushes."

Boobs's

Yes, that is the correct title.
 Tonight's dinner conversation when a little something like this.
(I had already fed Beckett and he was stripped down and waiting for me to put him in the bath.  He and Paige were playing under the table while Mike and I ate dinner).
Paige:"Beckett's boobs's are getting big!"
Mama sits there trying to think up a response.  Technically she is correct. And yes, he is getting chubbier. However, we are working on titles lately (boy, girl, husband, wife, etc.) and I want to (of course) have this be a teaching moment.  But before I can come up with anything...
Paige: "I'm going to have boobs's some day."
Daddy: "You are right, but Beckett's boobs will stay small."
Paige: "Well, you have furry boobs's!"
Mike and I look at each other.
We don't have any response to that.

song

Paige is singing this song:
"I like to feel stuff, I like to feel stuff, I like to feel stuff, I like oranges.  Ha ua ha ha ha hahahahah ha hah."

Shower

I turn the shower on to get it warm in the mornings.  I leave the shower door a little open and today Beckett crawled into the bathroom, over to the shower, pulled the door open, and crawled right in.  In his pajamas.  And then he just sat there and opened and closed his hand, feeling the water on him.  It was so stinking cute.  And a little hard to get wet pajamas off of a rolly boy, but sill he had A LOT of fun in there.  Good to know.

Theme for Today

This is the song I just heard Paige sing as she whacked the couch with a stick:
"I like to fight!  I like to fight!  I like to fiiiight allllll dayyyyyy long!
I like to fight!  I like to fight! I like to fiiiiiiight because I am the queeeeen!
Ha ha ha ha, ha ha haha!  I like to fiiight the baaad guys"

(Sung to the tune of the farmer in the dell"

Oh, Thanks for the update

Paige: "Don't worry Mama,  I just swallowed my choke.  I'm okay."

Good thing she can just do that and I don't need to perform the Heimlich on her.

Public Education

Paige comes up to me and asks me if I want to hear the song she learned.  I say yes! 
Paige: "I LIKE TO MOVE IT, MOVE IT!  I LIKE TO MOVE IT MOVE IT!"
Mommy is stunned.  Where did she learn THIS song???
Mommy: "Paige, wow!  Where did you learn this song?"
Paige: "At school."
Mom is confused.  She does not go to school.
Mom:  "Which school?"
Paige: "The Bubble School!  Want to hear more?  I like to jump it jump it!  I like to move it move it!"

That's it.  She is never leaving the house again.

Baa Baa Black Sheep

Paige's version of Baa Baa Black Sheep:
Baa baa black sheep have you any wool?
Yes sir, yes sir, three bags full.
One for my master,
One for my name,
One for the little boy who lives down the drain.
Baa baa black sheep have you any wool?
Yes sir, yes sir, three bags full.

Joke by Paige

"Hey Mom!  Did you know that if you plant paper it will grow into paper trees?"  Big smile at her cleverness.
One minute later she comes around the corner with this one:
"Hey Mom!  Did you know that if you plant coloring books they will grow into coloring book trees?"  REALLY big smile.

So pleased with her cleverness!

That was not a compliment

Paige: "Mama, I like your hair."
Mama: "Thanks."
Paige:  "It looks like clown hair!"  and she smiles and runs off.

Toes

I heard Beckett wake up and went in to get him.

He was happily sucking on his toe.

It was, no doubt, one of the cutest things I have ever seen in my entire life.

A is for a lot of things

Paige is reading the Curious George Alphabet book to me:
"A is for crocodile. A is for Bird.  A is for Crab.  A is for Dinosaur.  A is for Elephant. A is for Fireman.  A is for Goose.  A is for House."  And she continued that way through the ENTIRE alphabet. 

Tempra Paint

I just learned that tempra paint stains trex decking. At least Paige thought art time was a success!  Won't Mike be surprised to learn it when he comes home tomorrow...

Oma's Reindeer Problem

Out of the blue this morning was this exciting conversation:
Paige: "Does Oma have reindeer that eat her carrots?"
Mama: "Yes."
Paige: "Does Oma's reindeer eat her flowers?"
Mama "Yes."
Paige: "Does Oma's reindeer eat her lemonade?"
Mama: "Um, yes."
Paige: "Oma doesn't have any groceries in her yard!  The reindeer ATE them all!!!"

Lizards know the difference

We finished our lunch outside.  Paige is playing on the far side of the yard.  All I hear is "come on!  Come on!!  Come over here!" A moment later Paige is by my side and in her most whiny voice she says: "Mama, the lizard won't obey me!  It won't obey me at all!" 
Mama: "I'm sorry that he won't obey you.  Lizards are not known for being very obedient."
Paige: "It's because I'm a girl.  Lizards don't obey girls."

New Skill

I just finished bathing and putting to bed Beckett.  Which means that Paige has been unobserved the last 15 minutes.  I come into the computer to find Photoshop application open (which it wasn't when I left the computer room) and it was also open to the Registration screen.  What country were we being registered in?  Vanuatu!


I then proceed to open up a Mozilla window and low-and-behold there already is a search typed into Google.  Can you guess what it is?

12534670*18706501546456+89+5525 66112.233232233235353555555555555555252212           bbbvxzxxzzzzzZZZZzzuiominubyvtcv             ----m

Great.  Just great. 

Story time

Mama is brushing her teeth.  Beckett is stating loudly that he is sad to be alone.  Mama asked Paige to go and please tell Beckett a story.  The following is the story she told him:
Paige: "Once upon a time your name was Paige.  And you had a sister named Beckett.  And you were happy.  And then there was a dragon RAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRR  and he was going to eat you and you were ssscccaaarrreeeddd."

Thanks Paige.  Thanks.

Please, don't hit me with lightning

There are frequent conversations with Paige regarding God - what he is, what he does, that kind of thing. Today outside we were watching the ants and she asked who made them.
Mama: "God did."
Paige: "Does he like them?"
Mama: "Yes! He likes them very much!"
Paige: "Then does he smell them?"
Mama:  "Um, I don't know."

Stories

I frequently tell Paige stories when we are driving. Today when we were driving home from Winco I got a request for two stories:
Paige: "Mama, can I hear a story about life?" 
and
Paige: "Mama, tell me a story about liquid!"  (Liquid was pronounced liqqqqquuuuiiiddd).

Oh boy.  Taking story requests just got more difficult!

Ricanos

We are driving home from visiting Oma in Bend.  We are driving past Mt. Shasta and the little butte that is next to it when we hear VERY loudly from the back seat:
Paige: "IS THAT A RICANO?"
Daddy: "Yes, that is a volcano!"
Paige: "THERE ARE TREES ON THE RICANO?!?"
Daddy: "Yes, trees grow on volcano's."
Paige: "TREE RICANO!!!!  I NEVER KNOWD!!!!!!!"

And it is only 6:29 am

All 4 of us are in bed this morning (don't worry, it was when everyone was awake).
Paige and Beckett are lying next to each other, holding hands and looking at one another.
Here are things she said to him:

Paige: "My jammers are NOT toys!!"

Paige: "My face is NOT a toy!!!!  Is my face a toy??"

Weird Shows

We are watching the movie Ponyo (anime).
Paige: "I don't like this show.  This show is weird to me.  I only like normal shows."

Okay.  No more anime for you!

Is there such a thing?

Paige is holding a book we checked out from the library yesterday.  We have not had a chance to read it yet when she says: "Is this a terrible book?"

Where did she learn about terrible books?????

Yes, because we were vegitarians until last night.

I made grilled pork chops last night for dinner. I cut some up and put it on Paige's plate.  She ate one.
Paige: "Yummy!!  Theses are good!  What are they?"
Mama: "Pork chops.  Meat."
Paige: "Yippie!!  I've never had meat before!"

We have a fun day ahead

It is 6:22 in the morning and I have already heard the following:


Beckett is nursing.  I am telling Paige a story.  Beckett stops nursing and coughs.
Paige: "BECKETT!!  Stop!!  Nobody likes that sound!"

I want you on my team!

We got Paige a butterfly net.  The handle is WAY too long and she keeps whacking people (her mother and brother) with it. 
So I am cutting the handle down 2 feet (yes, there was 3 feet left!) and I hear these encouraging words:
Paige: "You can do it Mama!"
"Keep trying!"
"Careful not to cut yourself!"
"This is so much fun - huh?!?"

She always makes me smile.

We are not that ugly...

Paige is looking at a picture of Mike and I.  In the picture there is nothing but the two of us and the background is far away so you cannot see anything.
Paige, pointing to the picture: "Is that a bicycle?" Looks up, confused.
Me: "NO, it's your Mom and Dad!"
Paige, sounding disapointed: "oh."

?Wha?

Work induced illness

It is a few minutes until bath and bed time.
Routine states that it is time to start picking up toys.
Mama: "Paige, please pick up the costumes and put them in the costume box."
Paige: "I think that my tummy is going to start hurting when I pick these dresses up."

Thank goodness she has 15 more years to think up better excuses than that one!

Yeah, because later would be better...

Mama is getting ready.
Beckett is playing on the floor.
Mama to Paige: "Please don't roll your brother up in the rug right now."

You need new friends kid

It is 95 degrees in the shade at our house.
The air conditioner is broken.
The air conditioner fix it man is here.
Paige opens the door to let him into the house.
Paige: "Oh yeah.  I opened the door because he is my best friend."

When the cat's away the mouse will, well, jump on the bed

I am taking a shower.  The bathroom door is open.  Beckett is lying playing with toys in the doorway.  All of a sudden I hear a bump, bump, bump, bump, bump, bump. And then this:
Paige, screaming at the very top of her lungs, while jumping on my bed: "FIVE LITTLE MONKEYS JUMPIN' ON DA BED.  ONE FELL OFF AND BUMPED HER HEAD.  MAMA CALLED THE DOCTOR AND THE DOCTOR SAID: NO MORE MONKEY JUMPIN' ON DA BED!!!!!!!!!"

Freestyle Walking

Paige is jumping off of a stool in the living room and spinning around while she jumps off.
Daddy: "You going to be a freestyle walker when you grow up?"
Paige: "YES!"
Mom and Dad exchange questioning looks.
Mommy: "What does a freestyle walker do Paige?"
Paige stands up on the stool again and says: "They do this!" And jumps off spinning around in a 360.
Mom and Dad again exchange looks.  Very scared looks.

Please don't become an accountant...

Paige is playing.  She brings a stack of books over.
Paige: "I'm goin' to cook the books!!"
And she does.  She gets a bowl and "cooks" them.

Turtle Wax

Daddy went to work one morning.  He texted Mama and asked her to bring the car wax to his station so that he could wax his truck later that day (after 5 pm they can do activities like that). So Mama, Paige, and Beckett are driving to the Fire Station to give him the wax.  Paige is holding it when we get there and she gives it to her Dad.
Paige: "I promise not to lick it!"
Dad: "That's great honey!"
Paige: "You gonna wack the fire engine now Daddy?"
Dad: "I'm going to wax my truck later."
Paige: "NOOO!!!  You are going to wack the fire engine NOWWW!"

Lunch today

We are eating lunch today.
Paige: "May I be excused?"
Mama (with her mouth full): "Yes.  Thank you for asking."
Paige gets down from the table and says: "Don't talk with your mouth full."
She walks away and adds: "and swallow your food."

Thanks for the advice kid.

Good question

Paige: "What are we going to do with  me?"

Honestly kid, I don't know.

Crashes Crashes

Paige: "Ring around the mosey, pocket full of rosie, crashes, crashes, we all fall down!"

Ohh Nooooo you don't!

Daddy:  "Paige, pick up the stuffed animals and put them in their bucket."
Paige: "Dad, you just need to relax."

Seriously???  We are in for it.

Hicking Up

Daddy burped.
Paige: "Mama!  Daddy is hicking up!!"

Dirt

Paige: "Mama?"
Mama: "Yes hun?"
Paige: "I need to tell you something.  (pause).  About dirt."

Hummingbirds

Things I have heard/said about hummingbirds lately:

There is a new orange hummingbird at out house.
Paige: "I want to lick him!!!!!"

Mama to Paige:  "Seriously, Paige, you cannot drink from the hummingbird feeder.  It is for the birds and you are a puppy!!!"

Good Idea

Paige just threw up.  All over her room.
Mike and I go in and are cleaning it up.
I have given her a small silver bowl to use if she needs to throw up again.
Paige: "And then I can spit up in this bowl and fill it all up and then get another one and fill it all up.  That sounds like a great idea!"

Yes Paige, a great idea.

Do not make this at home....

Paige: "Pat a cake, Pat a cake, bakers man, make me a cake as fast as you can.  Roll it and salt it and peanut butter it, and sauce it."
Yum?

It must be a Monday....

Statements I have heard today:

Paige: "Cookies come from church???????" (to which I answered: "NO!").

Paige: "I like my buns.  Even when they are cold.  BRRRRR!!!" (to which I answered: "That's nice.").

Paige: "Does Jesus wash his clothes in the washing machine?"  (to which I answered: "yes").

Chicken Hair

This morning we are in a craft store.  A girl with a foot tall pink mohawk walks by. 
Paige: "MAMA!! LOOK!!!  A GIRL WITH CHICKEN HAIR!!! MAMA!!! CHICKEN HAIR!!! CHICKEN HAIR!!!"

Um, I thought I had more time...

Paige's 2 cousins and their aunty and dog came for a visit.  They forgot a little dog toy when they left.
Mommy:  "Daddy, do you know where the D-O-G toy went?"
Daddy: "No, I thought it was on the counter."
Paige: "I put it in my tent.  Paige is a NAUGHTY girl!!"
Mommy goes and checks in her tent.  Sure enough, there is the dog toy.

Mornign Hair

Grammie:  "Paige!  Your hair is crazy!  Go look in the mirror!"
Paige goes and looks at herself in the mirror: "Grandpa did it!!"

Um, no he did not!

Bees

Paige: "I hear a bee flying.  It makes my nose itch."

Technically, Yes....

This morning we are talking about how Paige and Mama are girls and Beckett is a boy.

Paige:  "And there are two bodies at the fire station!"

Um, yes, but wha????

Sweet Sister

Paige and Mama are changing Beckett's diaper this morning. He is a little unhappy while I button him up again in his clothing.

Paige in a super soft sweet voice: "Shhhh.  I'm Sister.  We are here.  We are here."

Things I just heard...

Mama: "Paige, would you like a clean diaper?"
Paige: "Yes! Hold on, I'm getting my peezes out. Oh..almost all done. Yep! All done!"


Mama: "Why is there a wet spot on the couch?"
Paige, sounding VERY pleased with herself: "I just put Ice in the couch!"


Happy. Monday.

Itchy Brother

Beckett is sitting in his bouncy chair - chillin'.
Out of nowhere, Paige reached down and starts scratching his forehead. Hard.
Mama: "Stop scratching him. He doesn't have an itch there!"

Easter Conversation

It was Easter last week. We talked about the Crucifixion to Paige.

This morning Paige cannot find her teddy bear.
Mama: "Did you look in your room by your bed?"
Paige: "NO! Jesus Killed him!!!"

Thus ensued a long conversation about what Jesus does and does not do and where teddy bears are.

Confusion

Paige and Mama are talking this morning about where Heavenly Father lives. We are talking about who he lives with (his family, that we are a part of) and his friends (we are his friends too).

Paige: "And soon, Jesus is going to come out of my tummy. Not yet but soon!"

Actually, not.

Pure Sugar

We are outside playing in the mud box.
Paige to Mama: "Don't speak to me. I'm making pure sugar. Don't speak to me EVER AGAIN!"

Great. This is just great.

Dinner

Paige: "I'm making soup!"
Mama: "What kind?"
Paige: "Orange and apple soup with soap salad and I mix it all up mix it mix it mix it!"

Batteries

Paige: "I like batteries! They are so nice. They are speaking to me!"

hmmmmmmm.

Guns

Mike gets the BB gun from the pantry to go and scare a squirl from digging in the bark in our yard. Paige and Mama are eating cereal at the table.
Paige: "What doing Daddy?"
Daddy: "Going for a walk outside."
It is POURING rain at this point. He leaves with the gun and goes outside.
Paige (to Mama): "Is he going to go shoot someone?"

Rainbows

Two days ago there was a beautiful rainbow in the sky.
This morning Paige and Mama are having a discussion about where it went.
Mama: "Rainbows don't last long in the sky honey."
Paige: "That's because they are NOT toys! They are Rainbows!"

What do your clothes do?

When we tuck Paige into bed each night she asks us questions.

Last night:
Paige: "What is my slide doing?"
Mama: "Resting."
Paige: "What is my rug doing?"
Mama: "Resting."

You get the point.

Tonight:
Paige: "What is your shirt going to do tonight?"
Daddy: "I'm going to wear it."
Paige: "What is Mommy's shirt going to do tonight?"
Daddy: "She's going to wear it."

Nice way to try to not go to sleep kid.

Mr. Sunshine

Paige and I are playing outside early in the morning.
It is sunny and windy.
Paige: "Get out of my eyes Mr. Sunshine!! You are NAUGHTY!"

Ummmm, yeah, I don't know how to proceed

Paige walks over to the time-out wall, bends down, scoops up the "baby" and says:
Paige: "You can get out of time out now baby!"
Then proceeds to walk over to Daddy who is sitting on the couch and throw the baby on him.
Paige: "Catch him Daddy!"

If the baby is imaginary then do I really need to remind her to be soft with him?

Maybe for you...

I am tucking Paige in bed.
Every night we talk about what we will do in the morning.
Mama: "And after we go to the store with Daddy we will get some hot coco and go and walk across the big tall bridge." (Sundial Bridge).
Paige: "And not fall down the dog bridge but be very careful crossing all the logs."
She pauses for a moment.
Mama: "Okay."
Paige quickly adds: "Those are our options. Our good options."
Mama: "Okay."

The absence of color is dumb.

Paige and I are coloring.
She is picking up each crayon and coloring and talking the whole time.
She picks up a white crayon and states: "This one is broken though. It doesn't work. It broken."

This frustrates her because she can see that there is crayon to be colored with, however, when white crayon is colored on white paper, nothing shows up.

Broken.

Silly crayon.

Silly Crayola for including it in our box of 24 crayons.

Buddy

Mike and I are putting up painters tape in the baby's room.
Paige comes in and climbs up on a stool in-between us.
Paige: "What are you doing my buddies?"

Kiddo! I LOVE being your buddy!!!
Talk about making my heart swell.

Jammers

So if you don't know, Paige has been having some sensory issues. It is nothing terrible. Maybe just the 2/3 year old issues. However, she won't wear certain clothes. No jeans. Nothing itchy. Tags are a problem.
And I'm due to give birth in 3 weeks.
So she wears her pajamas a lot.
We have 2 kinds of 'jammers. Day jammers (no footies) and night jammers (with footies).
Paige has renamed night jammers to 'creepers'.
Yeah, - I don't know why.

Last night as we are turning the corner to go into her bed she announces happily:
"My creepers are WORKING!"

Good. Probably because your legs are inside them moving.....

Past tense...

We are eating clementine oranges with lunch.
Paige bites one section in half and it squirts everywhere.
Mama: "Wow! You kind of gleeked on me!"
Paige: "Yeah, it was a good glink."

Proud Mama Moment

We are driving in the car.
The radio is tuned to the "at-work" station (='s yucky music I turn to when nothing else is on).
A song comes on the radio. It is from the mid '90's group All 4 One.
At the TOP of her lungs Paige almost screams: "I DON"T LIKE THIS MUSIC!!!"

Ahhh. I'm so proud!!!

I know you are

While building a castle and adding little toy figures to it I hear:
Paige: "Help us! Help us! We're dangerous!!!"

I know you are dear.

Time for a lesson on lying. And Fire safety.

Paige woke up at 5 this morning.
Mike and I stayed in bed and told her to play quietly in the living room.
At 5:30 she runs in and happily exclaims in a very loud voice:
"Come see the fire in the living room!"
Yeah. That is the QUICKEST way to get parents out of bed.
Especially when one is a fireman.
There was NO fire in the living room.
Paige had organized paper into a circle and was pretending it was a fire.
Mike said to her: "NO, that is NOT a fire." and went back to bed.
I grabbed a blanket and took to the couch to monitor any future fire activity.
There was none.

Say what?

5:50 am conversation goes like this:
Paige: "What doing Mom?"
Mom: "Resting."
Paige: "HEEE HAWWWWW!!!!!" super loudly.

I just did not respond. I don't quite know what to say.

Clouds

Paige and Mama are playing outside.
Paige is throwing a big ball up in the air and some times catching it.
Paige stops and announces: "Look Mama! The clouds are broken!!"

Ahh honey - not broken, just wispy!

It's the first time in a month we have seen the sun shine....

Yeah, Daddy can count.....

We are sitting down for dinner tonight.
Paige: "May I be excused?"
Daddy: "You first have to eat 2 bites of yams."
Paige inserts one bite.
Daddy: "One..."
Paige inserts another bite.
Daddy: "Three..."
Paige inserts another bite.
Daddy: "Four...."
Paige inserts another bite.
Daddy: "Two!! Good job!!"

Nice counting Daddy.

Creative cooking

Paige and I made lots of banana muffins yesterday.
Today she is eating one.
She stops and looks at it.
Paige: "There's a lot of spiders legs in here!"

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Uh - welcome Thursday?

Things I've heard this morning:

Paige: "I want more lips." (said in a sad pouting voice)

Paige: "Lets play a game. It's called cookie snacker." Really? Does it involve you snacking on cookies?

What Hummingbirds REALLY do

We have a humming bird feeder on our window right next to the dining room table. This makes for many an interesting meal time conversation.

Tonight at dinner is one example.

Paige: "What are the hummingbirds doin'?"

Mama: "Probably asleep somewhere." (okay - not a great answer, but I'm tired).

Paige: "NO! Silly! They are laughing and playing and watching a show somewhere!"

I just agree. Because, really, she could be right....

Jesus vs. Dallin H. Oaks

We are at church.
Elder Dallin H. Oaks is walking by.
We shake his hands.
Paige and I turn around and she says: "He's NOT Jesus!"

Disclaimer: I never said he was! I never told her she would see Jesus at church today! And, they don't look ANYTHING alike! (Elder Oaks has a REALLY shiny bald head and no facial hair. I'm not too sure what Jesus looks like, but I think he has hair....maybe.....)

Being a good friend is easy!

Mike comes home from work and pours himself a bowl of cereal.
Paige: "What doing Daddy?"
Daddy: "Eating a bowl of Shredded Wheat."
Paige: "Oh. That makes you a good friend!"

If I had only known...

I should have stayed in bed. Oh wait. I was.

It is 5:30 am.
Daddy is getting the hair cutting supplies together so I can cut his hair before work today.
Paige: "What doing Daddy?:
Daddy: "Getting ready for my haircut."
Paige: "Oh! Mommy is so silly!"

Why am I the silly one? It wasn't my idea.....